The letter
by antares.78
Summary: Death changes everything!He was sure Cuddy should have been there. He was dead, for Christ sake! But she wasn't there... Post season 8. Rate T - Huddy Complete (But... "The letter-epilogue" is coming soon)
1. Death changes everything

_Set after season 8 finale. Here 'Everybody dies' takes place just a few months after 'Bombshells', but anyway after House spent six months in jail for having driven his car into Cuddy's living room. Same events of the series: House and Cuddy's break-up, his marriage with Dominika and all the s*** that came after, including Wilson's cancer._

* * *

 _..._

 **THE LETTER**

...

* * *

 **Chapter 1 - Death changes everything**

* * *

...

"He's... dead" he just whispered as soon as he heard her voice on the other end of the line.

Cuddy stood motionless.

"W-what?" She said as she almost choked that word in her throat.

"Er... there was a fire and... he was there and...er..."

Wilson voice cracked.

"I know he wasn't part of your life anymore but... they couldn't even recognize him, Cuddy, and... er... sorry, this doesn't matter right now... er... the funeral is tomorrow at 4 pm. I just... thought you have to know..."

She didn't reply. No sound came from the other end of the line and for a moment he thought the line was off. Until he heard Arlene's voice in the background.

 _... Lisa?_

 _... Honey, what's wrong?_

What came after he couldn't tell for sure. Muffled sounds. Her labored breathing. Then, the line was off.

* * *

He was sure Cuddy should have been there. He was dead, for Christ sake! But she wasn't there...

He looked at that empty chair. Everyone was there. Everyone who had worked with him was there. Even Nurse Jeffrey.

His team. The old one near the new one.

...

Park and Adams.

...

 _... House hired me when no one else would..._

 _... He got me fired. He gave me the guts to get fired..._

 _..._

Masters. Taub. Thirteen. And Cameron. And Chase.

...

 _...he gave me the courage to quit..._

 _... he made me a better parent, whether he meant to or not..._

...he was willing to kill me. And I'll always be grateful...

 _... he wasn't always easy to deal with... but somewhere in there...he knew how to love..._

 _..._

And Foreman.

...

 _... He was my boss. And my employee. And both times...I learned from him..._

...

Everyone was there. Who hated him was there... next to who had loved him.

...

His mother. Even Stacy and... Dominika.

...

 _... He was a good son..._

 _... He was a trying boyfriend... but I... never stopped loving him..._

 _... He was my husband for real. I couldn't help but love him..._

...

He was his friend. And an ass. An ass who saved lives, but an ass anyway.

He mocked anyone... patients, co-workers, his dwindling friends. Anyone who didn't measure up to his insane ideals of integrity. He claimed to be on some heroic quest for truth, but the truth was, he was a bitter jerk who liked making people miserable. And he proved that by dying selfishly, numbed by narcotics, without a thought of anyone. A betrayal of everyone who cared about him.

And yet... they were all there. All. All but the only one he had really loved.

Everyone had a few words for him. But... not even a word from her. Not from Cuddy. That was weird. Despite the events of the last months he had been an important part of her life. And death changes everything! Was she really so mad with him not to pay even her last respects to him?

He squeezed Blythe's hand, looking at her for a brief moment as she looked back. She had anything left anymore. She didn't have the same composure she had had at her husband's funeral. No mother should see her son's death. He watched her as she looked in front of herself. Her eyes full of tears as her son's blue eyes stared at her from the picture near the altar. The same eyes she couldn't look into anymore.

No mother should attend her son's funeral.

* * *

"Gregory!"

"Gregory, c'mon! Stop hiding. Where are you?"

She bend over to look under the desk but he wasn't there.

"I swear to God I'm gonna kill him with my own hands as soon as I catch him!" She hissed in a low voice, talking to herself and running a hand on her forehead "Shit! Actually _his mother_ is gonna kill me with her own hands!" She pointed out with a sigh as she walk down the hallway, opening doors and calling his name from time to time and bending over here and there to look for him under every desk and chair.

Blythe House looked at her and couldn't help a little smile from appearing on her lips. How many times had she did the same with _her_ Gregory?! She shook her head slightly as a lump closed her throat at that thought and sighed, looking at the clock on that waiting room wall and then turning her attention back to the magazine in her hands. Not that she was really reading it actually. She was barely watching the pictures on it. Because everything reminded her of her son. From the Cheerios advertising in bright colors on the bottom of the magazine page to the old man with a cane sitting in front of her in that orthopedic ward of the Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston.

It lasted just a minute and then a bump under the plastic chair in which she sat caught her attention. She bent down and she couldn't help but smile as she looked at the little boy crouched under it. More or less two years old. Covering his face with both hands as he obviously thought none could see him if he didn't see them.

"Gregory, right?" She asked in a soft tone, smiling and looking at him.

"Nu _w_ se bad. _Me_ want Mommy" he said not taking his tiny hands from his face.

"We can look for Mommy, sweetheart" She said "Ok?"

He nodded, lowering his head as he slinked out, then standing up and reaching out for Blythe's hand and meeting her gaze.

The smile on her face froze and she looked into his eyes as she was watching a ghost.

"Le _s_ 's look fo _w_ Mommy?" He asked.

She swallowed and just nodded, deeply inhaling as she stood up. For sure her mind was making fool of her. However she couldn't help but thinking of _her_ Greg as she took his tiny hand and walked with him down the hallway. He was too little to know where his mother could be, and that poor woman was certainly driving crazy not knowing where her little boy was, so she thought that all she could do was to take him at the nurses' station on the ground floor.

She watched the closed door of the elevator as they slowly slid open. The two women inside were arguing about something and for a moment they didn't pay attention at her, nor she at them, too focused on that little boy holding her hand.

She froze as soon as she looked up and her green eyes met the gray-blue ones in front of hers. They both looked speechless at each other for a moment before a _'Mommy!'_ distracted them, making them both look down at the little boy. He left Blythe's hand and put his arms around his mother's leg.

Blythe looked at her own hand for a moment before looking again at the woman in front of her and at the little boy now in her arms, his tiny arms around her neck. Again as she was looking at a ghost.


	2. Gregory

Time to meet little Gregory and to answer the big question: where the hell was Cuddy in that damned last episode of season 8? My own version obviously. I don't own House Md. If I did the series wouldn't have had that sh***y ending.

* * *

 **...**

 **Chapter 2 - Gregory**

 **...**

* * *

 _... Lisa?_

 _...Honey, what's wrong?_

Arlene looked at her daughter. Her hand was shaking and she was so pale she looked like she was passing out.

Actually... because she was.

"Oh God, you need to sit down" she said as the phone fell from Cuddy's hand, bouncing on the floor and then opening in two parts as the battery rolled under the coffee table.

She almost didn't feel her mother hand on her arm as she leaded her to the couch, making her sitting down. She closed her eyes, trying to stabilize her labored breathing.

"Lisa?" She tried again, looking with a worried look at the hand on her stomach "Who was it?"

She didn't open her eyes, just whispering a labored _'House'_.

"I swear to God I'll sent him to jail again if he just tries to come near you or the kids" She hissed, sitting down next to her daughter, that didn't reply.

"Lisa, you have to calm down" She said again, putting in turn a hand on her stomach and looking at her as she grimaced in pain and put her free hand on her forehead as her belly hardened.

"Please... tell me it's not true" she whispered, still with closed eyes "Oh my God, Mom... it can't be true..."

She couldn't breathe. She felt like she had a boulder on her chest.

Arlene watched her with an even more worried look.

"What can't be true?" She asked.

"He... he's dead" she whispered "My baby's father is dead"

* * *

Two years had passed since that day.

Her life had ended in that moment. And started again in that same day. Because death changes everything! And a part of her was dead with him in that same day. She had tried to convince herself that she didn't love him anymore, but the more she tried the more she became aware that wasn't true. She would always be bound to him. What he did, crashing his car against her living room, was something so strong she couldn't act like anything had happened, she had to protect herself and Rachel, but the truth was that she didn't blame him as she pretended she did. It was his fault, but hers too. She hadn't helped him as she had to. She knew he was an addict. She knew she couldn't blame him for that and for his weakness in front of that. She knew she had to blame herself as much she blamed him. Because if love is supporting each other and trusting in each other...well, in that she had failed.

But the destiny had played unfair with her.

She opened the drawer and sat down on her bed, turning that letter in her hands. It was for him, but he had never read it. The mailman had put it back in her postbox a few days after that phone call. An _'Addressee not found. Returned to the sender'_ stamped on it.

He never knew. He never knew of the life growing inside her. She had spent so much nights awake thinking about what to do. About how telling him the truth. She was so determined to hide that to him in the beginning! But then the months had gone by... and every kick of the baby inside her womb was a reminder of him. Moving in Massachusetts hadn't been enough. Those almost 300 miles weren't enough and she knew that not even 3 thousands of them would have been enough. She had tried to move on... changing her job and life but it hadn't worked. Not at all. And every thyroid storm she saw as Head of Endocrinology reminded her of him, knocking at her door in the middle of the night pretending to need a consult. That's why in the end she had decided about that letter.

She opened the envelope and looked at those sheets biting her lip and looking up at the ceiling as her eyes misted. She couldn't help it. She missed him. In such a way that sorrow turned almost in physical pain. She looked down again at that letter in which here and there the ink had faded because of her tears fallen on it so many times in those two years.

She could barely read it because of her clouded sight but she knew it by heart.

.

 _House,_

 _If you're reading this it means you didn't throw it in the trash as soon as you read the sender on the envelope, so it's already a step forward._

 _I'd like to say that I don't know why I'm doing this but the truth is that I know it. I tried. God knows how much I tried to forget you. But I failed. And I miss you. I miss your eyes, I miss the way you used to tease me and to make fun of me, I miss everything. I miss you being you. And not how I thought I would have liked you to be... just... you being you._

 _I tried. I tried so hard... but I can't hate you. I just... can't. I failed in loving you and I failed in hating you._

 _So... God, House, what's wrong with me? What's wrong with us? You hurt me in all the ways someone could hurt me... and I still love you. And I can't help but ask to myself: "Did he really love me?"_

 _I thought you did. I really thought you did. I want to trust you did! So...I just keep asking myself: "Why?" I thought about that so many times. I know you didn't want to kill me. I thought that at first. That's why you went to jail and I moved away, far from my job, my friends, my life. Far from you. It didn't work. You haunt me. Every night since that day. But you know what? You killed me. On that day you really did it. And sometimes I feel like what's left is just the ghost of myself. Now I know what being you is. I know what being miserable is. I pretend to be happy but I can't even remember what happiness is... and I wonder if I'll never be happy again._

 _Sorry. Pity isn't what I want from you. Nor making you even more miserable. Nor making you feel guiltier than how I know you already feel._

 _Well, now I can almost hear your teasing voice asking me "So? What do you want from me, Cuddy?"_

 _I'd like it were easy to answer that question. Actually it is. For me it is. But... things are never easy between us, aren't them?._

 _I know that maybe I'm making a fool of myself, but I can't help but think... "Does he still love me like I do?" ...because, well... I know that I hurt you as much as you hurt me... so... I'm not blaming you if you don't... if you moved on..._

 _I know from Wilson that you still live in your apartment and well, you know him, he obviously felt the need to tell me even that Dominika is gone. I know about your new team at PPTH. About your new boss. Well, I think I know too much for someone who pretends she doesn't care._

 _I'm sorry, House! I know you'd say that's because of my Jewish guilty... but I'm sorry. I really am. I'm sorry because I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry we didn't talk. I'm sorry I didn't tell you what I felt and I didn't let you tell me what you felt. Your "Wanna know how I feel, Cuddy?" still spins in my mind together with your "I feel hurt". And yes, I feel guilty. Because that was the exact moment in which we could have changed things. I'll never forgive myself for letting you go away after that. Nor even after you gave me back that damned brush._

 _I know what are you thinking right now, and... no. You didn't deserve jail, House! And even more... jail wasn't what you needed. You needed me. And if I loved you just a quarter of how much I know I love you I had to be there. For you._

 _Why is it so easy writing this right now? Why on the other side is it so hard saying it out loud?_

 _I'm trying House. I'm trying not to do the same mistakes again._

 _So, well... there's not an easy way to say what I have to say. I just want you to know that I'm not asking anything. I'm not forcing you into anything. And... you know me well enough to know that I'm not here, writing this, just because of it. I just think you deserve to know. To know that in a few weeks a baby boy will look at the world for the first time._

 _Our baby, House. Ours._

 _So, well... I lied. I lied when I said I'm not here because of him. Because... each one of his_ kicks reminds me of you. So... I just can't. I can't hide this from you. I'm not asking you to be his dad. But you are his father anyway. He'll ask about you. One day he'll ask about you. What do I have to say him, House? What do you want me to say him?

Again, I'm not asking you anything. I don't want to force you in something bigger than you but... well, all I want you to know is that I'm not going to keep him away from you.

I don't know what I'll tell him when he grow up. I just know I'm not going to lie to him. Is it that bad if I tell him he came from his parents' love? Because... he did, House.

I was thinking about sending you a picture from my last ultrasound but, you know, suddenly your voice rang in my head with a "It's just a fetus. How can you be so emotional, Cuddy!" so I decided it was a bad idea.

If you want, well, you now know where to find me. Well, us. My address is on the envelope. I work at the Massachusetts General Hospital. Don't look for the Dean of Medicine because, well, I'm not a Dean anymore. Back to be a real doctor. Who would have thought it?! So... Endocrinology. Where everything began.

Well... I think it's better for me to say goodbye now. My back hurts like hell so I'm totally in your shoes right now. Miserable and in pain.

And in love with you.

Cuddy

xxx

.

She looked at her own signature scribbled on the sheet. And then again at that _'and in love with you'_ and she can't avoid another tear from falling on the _y_ of her name turning it in a grey spot.

"No cwy Mommy..."

She closed her eyes, wiping the tears from her cheeks and inhaling and then exhaling deeply trying to regain control of herself, before looking at him, smiling slightly at the little boy in his light blue pajamas.

"It's ok, sweetheart" she said in a soft tone, as he climbed up the bed and then curled up in her arms "I'm not crying"

He put his little arms around her neck and she buried her nose in his soft dark hair, inhaling his scent. He smelled so good.

"What's wrong, my baby boy?" She asked as her finger drew circles around the little green dinosaurs of his pajamas.

"Me want sleep in youw big bed" He said clinging even more to her.

"What's wrong with your bed?" She asked, even if she could already foresee his answer.

"You no thewe" He answered as she couldn't help but smile, holding him tightly.

"So... are you going to leave Rachel there all alone?" She asked teasing him but moving the sheet by side, making room for him.

"Wachel big. Gwegowy little" He said resting his head on her pillow and curling up under the sheets as she smiled and kissed his hair, laying down near him and holding him close.

"Yes... " she smiled again at the thought of how many R were in those line and in his name, and how difficult was for him to be able to pronounce it "Sweet dreams my sweet little boy" She whispered on his hair, caressing his arm and savoring the warm spreading from his tiny body.

 _Gregory._

 _._

 _She hadn't decide a name for her baby yet. She was probably going to name him James, after her own father, but she hadn't decided yet, despite her mother's push. She knew that she had to figure it out in those few left weeks but she thought she still had time._

 _"Oh my God, Mom... it can't be true..."_

 _"Lisa, Honey, you have to calm down" She said again, putting in turn a hand on her stomach and looking at her as she grimaced in pain and put her free hand on her forehead as her belly hardened._

 _"I have to go there, Mom" she said after a few moments, standing up and ignoring her mother "I have to see him"_

 _"See him?" She looked at her "He's dead, Lisa. There's nothing you can say or make anymore. I know how you feel right now but I can't let you drive for hours just for..."_

 _She took her arm and Cuddy glared at her._

 _"You can't even imagine how I feel right now, Mom" She replied holding her gaze._

 _"Yeah! But I can't let you drive like this! Look at you, Lisa!" She said pointing to the mirror in front of her "You already had contractions. Your breathing is shallow. Do you want to give birth to my grandson on the highway?"_

 _She looked at her daughter as she closed her eyes and held her breath, holding her belly with one hand._

 _"Honey, you're shocked right now. You're right... I-I can't even imagine what's going through your mind now... but, please... you already lost him. You can't risk to lose his baby too"_

What came after was clouded... sort of wrapped in the fog...

She remembered pain. So much pain. But that kind of pain was nothing compared to the grief. Pain and grief so tied together that death would have been a liberation. She would have welcomed Her as a comforting Sister.

 _On that day she was dead. And then, on that same day, back to life. Tears rolling down her cheeks as she looked at the baby in her arms. At their baby. His little fist wrapped around her finger and his blue eyes staring at her._

 _Gregory._

 _She knew she was going to live for him. To be happy for him. To be there for helping him to be the man of whom his father would be proud too. And to be there for telling him, again and again and again, how his father was the most incredible man she has ever known._

...

* * *

 **Author's note:**

A few of you told me the timing here is not in accord with the events of the original series. It's true. I warned you in the beginning of the fanfic, before chapter 1, but I probably wasn't that clear. This fanfic is set after season 8 finale, but here 'Everybody dies' takes place just a few months after 'Bombshells' . I chose to have the same events of the original series (House and Cuddy's break-up, his marriage with Dominika and all the s*** that came after, including Wilson's cancer) but with a shorter timing. I'm one of those people who didn't watch s8... so it's easier for me not to consider it. Practically, here all the events of season 8 happen in just one month (and 'Everybody dies" is practically 9 months after 'Bombshells'). So, she was a few weeks pregnant when he drove his car against her house, then he left the Country for more or less 1 month, he spent 6 months in jail and 1 again at PPTH... and she wasn't at the funeral because she was nine month pregnant and in labour.

Now... Gregory here is almost 2 and a half years old. The question is "Where is House?", "Where was he in these 2 and a half years?"

You'll know it very soon! ;)

Bye


	3. Coma-guy

_Happy new year to everyone! Here a new chapter. Enjoy!_

* * *

 **...**

 **Chapter 3 - Coma-guy**

 **...**

* * *

"It's crazy, Mike! Haven't you ever heard of something like that?"

"What?" Dr. Wyle looked at his colleague and friend with a bored look before realizing what he was talking about "Oh right, Coma-guy!"

Dr. Anderson nodded, reaching for his steak with French fries on the counter in front of him, then putting it on his tray.

"Right! Coma-guy!" He said with an annoyed look "He feels better than me and you put together and he's gonna be discharged in a few days. That guy is... I don't know! He opened his eyes after fourteen months and nine days in a coma and the first thing he said to nurse Anne is that her voice is too raspy so she needs to see..."

He didn't finish that sentence and just sighed as soon as he realized that his friend's attention wasn't for him anymore, focused on something definitely more interesting of that anecdote. Well, he couldn't blame him after all!

"Sorry, Lisa" Dr. Wyle said looking at Cuddy who just smiled slightly "He really didn't know what _professional secret_ means".

She smiled, slightly biting her lower lip. Those two guys reminded her so much of another two ones from her... well, from her _past_ life.

"Are you going to the fundraiser gala on Saturday night? I was thinking that... maybe we could go together" He said with a lightly uncomfortable smile.

"Oh... well... yes, but... actually I don't even know if I'll be able to be there" She said with a half smile and a sigh "I... I need to find the umpteenth babysitter first" She pointed out with another sigh.

He laughed and as an answer she glared at him.

"Don't laugh!" She said as she couldn't help but let out a laugher in turn "It's not funny at all!"

"So... did Gregory make the babysitter run away?" He asked, this time holding back that laugher.

She ran a hand on her forehead and shook her head.

"That one. And the one before that. And the one before that" She said looking at him and smiling slightly "But if I'm lucky maybe I'll be able to leave him and Rachel with his grandmother"

He nodded, looking at her with a thoughtful look. _His? Not... their?_

"So is your mother in town?" He asked.

Cuddy shook her head, looking down at her own tray as she put an apple on it and then looked up at him again.

"Er... no" She said shaking her head "It's the mother of Gregory's father. I'll ask her if the kids can have a sleepover"

She smiled, looking at him as he smiled too.

...

* * *

"I can do it by myself, thank you" He said to the nurse as she looked at him and smiled then walking out of the room. He placed both hands on the armrests of that wheelchair and slowly stood up, leaning on the bed for support, more for habit that because he really needed that.

No pain.

Two still weak legs because of those long months motionless in a hospital bed but... no pain. No pain anymore.

He didn't have an answer for that, nor he knew if that was going to last or if he was going to be back in pain when he least expected it... but he didn't care. He didn't care about not having an answer for that. Maybe he had just to thank _that Big Joe_ for that. What the fuck did that guy think of doing? Killing him? How could he kill a already dead man? Because that he was. A dead man. He had anything left. The only woman he had ever really loved was gone... because of him. His best friend was dead. His mother... well...

He run a hand through his hair. His too long hair.

Her _'You're absolutely perfect just the way you are'_ rang in his mind.

He didn't deserve her. She didn't deserve a son like him. What could he give her? Again sorrow. Again disappointment. Actually it was better for her to stay like that... crying on a grieve and moving on... without him.

He sighed while slowly walked toward the bathroom. He stared at himself in the mirror and ran a hand on his chin. Definitely too long beard and hair. And too many grey hair.

...

He shook his head slightly, still looking at himself and running his hand on his now smooth chin and cheeks and then through his still too long hair. Well... a guy has to start somewhere! He ran the towel on his face again before walking back in his bedroom. His muscles aching because of all those hours of physiotherapy after a lack of movement of too many months.

A noise caught his attention as soon as he walked toward the bed and he looked around in the silence of that room. A sort of bump... like a shoe bumping against a wooden door.

 _Like a little white and dark blue Nike shoe bumping against the wooden door of his closet._

"I can see you" he said as soon as he opened both the closet doors and looked at the little boy hidden inside it. A short-sleaved white T-shirt and a pair of jeans. His little hands on his face as he obviously thought none could see him if he didn't see them.

"No, you can't" His little voice replied from behind his hands.

He sighed.

"Did none tell you that the world doesn't disappear just because you can't see it?" He asked in a sarcastic and annoyed tone as the child didn't move "...well, fine... I'll pretend you're not here then"

"I aweady told you. I'm not hewe"

He smiled. _So stubborn! Well, he liked stubbornness!_

"Good then, because actually you shouldn't be here. Why are you in my closet?"

"Mommy says not tawking with stwangews." He replied still covering his face with both hands but peeking at him through his little fingers.

"Good enough. Your mother is right! So maybe you shouldn't hide in strangers' closets." He said as he couldn't help but slightly smile.

Again he didn't reply, still covering his face with both hands, obviously still convinced none could see him. Well, after all he was what? A three-year old? No...two... two and a half at most.

"Fine! I'm _not_ for the _'nice to meet you'_... but... I'm Greg" He said.

"No. I am." He replied again from behind his little hands.

"What?" He asked, this time looking at him with a questioning gaze.

"I'm Gweg. Can't steal my name"

He laughed louder this time.

"I'm older than you. At most, you stole it." He said shaking his head.

He moved his hand from his face and gave him a glare. A glare that reminded him of...

NO...

He looked into what looked like the same blue that had been looking at him from the mirror for 52 years. But that glare reminded him of...

NO... that was insane! It probably was just a joke of his out-of-coma mind. His mind had been clouded for more than a year so now it was clearly making fool of him. The owner of that glare was actually the last woman on earth who could name a child after him.

"Fine. You can keep it. I'm House then"

Gregory laughed.

"That's a funny name." He said smiling.

"That's mine! You can't have it, ok?" He said with a serious look as he held back a smile at his contagious smile.

Gregory nodded.

"So... it looks like we're not strangers anymore, Greg." House said reaching for his hand and shaking his so tiny hand.

"Gwegowy" He pointed out.

House couldn't help but laugh.

"Shit, your mom hates you very much... you'll learn how to spell it when you're at least six!" He said shaking his head and looking at him as he suddenly pouted.

"Shit is a bad wowd" He said glaring at him again "And... you awe bad..." he said pouting more as his blue eyes misted "Mommy loves me..."

 _Shit!_

"Oh, c'mon don't start with waterworks now" He said running a hand over his face "I'm not good with kids! C'mon... I'm sorry"

Gregory ignored him, and big tears started to roll down his cheeks.

 _Shit! Why couldn't he just stop being an asshole! It was a two-year old for Christ Sake!_

"Yeah... ok... sorry, kiddo! I... of course your mom loves you very much!" He said. " _Well... so much that she lost you"_ He couldn't help but add in a low voice.

Gregory looked up at him, wiping his nose with the palm of his hand, but biting his lip at those words.

 _Shit again! It's a two-year old, not stupid... nor deaf._

"Mommy _not lost_ me" He said, sniffing.

"Ok. Come on. Stop crying. Fine. She loves you. I got this."

"I love mommy" he said sniffing again.

House looked at him. All that love was giving him diabetes! And he couldn't help it... he was allergic to all that sweetness!

"If you love her so much why are you giving her an heart attack?" He asked, again forgiving he was talking with a two-year old.

 _I really have to be insane! Am I really arguing with a toddler?_

"Want mama" Gregory said pouting again and rubbing his eyes with his little fists.

"Ok, kiddo" He said reaching for him and picking him up, then sitting down on the bed with him on his knees "Listen. I'm calling a nurse so she'll help you to find your mom, ok?" He said, this time in a soft tone and stroking his back.

"No!" He said shaking his head mightily "Nuwse bad"

"She's not bad at all" He replied with a slightly mischievous look raising an eyebrow "At your age you should still like boobs. Actually... at mine too!" He added with a sly smile as Gregory looked at him.

"Boobs awe fow babies" He innocently said "Mama says I can't have them anymore becawse I'm a big boy now"

House laughed.

"Don't worry you'll have them again when you really are a big boy" he said shaking his head and laughing "Well, not your mom's ones..." he added, that gesturing a _'fine, better not taking this way'_

Gregory didn't replied just looking at him with his big blue eyes, obviously too young to get his joke.

"So... you don't like nurses" House said with a thoughtful look as Gregory shook his head again and his dark curls waved.

House kept to look at him. He obviously wasn't a patient. Maybe one of his parents was ill and he was there to pay a visit...but no, he would be there, not hiding in a stranger's closet. And he wasn't a lost child. He was too calm, so he knew where he was and how to find his mother if he wanted.

"Nuwse says I have to stay with my fwiends..." he said with a serious look "...but they awe so bowing" He pointed out "I want mama. No like nuwse school"

"Nursery school?" He asked looking at him as he nodded "So... does your mother work here?" He asked as Gregory nodded again and opened his mouth to reply.

He suddenly closed it as soon as the door shut open, and covered his face again with both hands as the nurse on the door rolled her eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Sir" She said approaching them "He's a real tornado. I hope he didn't bother you too much" She said as House just looked at her and she took Gregory's hand.

"Why do you like so much this ward I really don't know" She said kneeling to tie Gregory's shoe laces then looking up at House who was still watching them "I really don't know what's so interesting in in-a-coma people"

"They don't tawk. I can watch cawtoons" Gregory replied staring at her and then looking again at House who held his gaze.

"C'mon" the nurse said again looking at Gregory. His little hand looked for something in his pocket and she whispered another 'I'm sorry' to House.

They both looked at him as he finally found what he was looking for and handed it to House.

"Bye" He just said, waving his little hand to him and smiling, then taking the nurse's hand.

House looked at the cherry lollipop in his hand and then again up at him.

"Bye, kiddo" He just reply as he walked out of the door.


	4. Paul

_A little Epiphany gift! Enjoy!_

* * *

 _..._

 **Chapter 4 - Paul**

...

* * *

"Gregory! C'mon!"

He looked at the closed door as he clearly could hear his sister's voice calling him, but he didn't answer, too focused on what he was doing.

"Oh, here you are!" Rachel said opening the door of her mother's bedroom "What are you doing? C'mon, Mom is waiting for us. We're late" She said approaching him and taking his arm.

"Wait!" He replied glaring at her and putting instead a colored pencil into her hand "Wwite 'Get well. Love you'" He said looking at her and then whispering a long _'pleeeeeeese',_ with big puppy eyes.

Rachel rolled her eyes and sighed, but took that pencil and wrote those words on the paper near what looked like a giant men and a smaller man with a too big head.

"Where did you take this sheet?" She asked handing it back to him while he shrugged, then folding it in half and putting it into his _Paw Patrol_ backpack.

Rachel shrugged in turn as she heard her mother's voice calling them from downstairs. She obviously had no time to wait for an answer.

"C'mon" She said, again taking his little brother's hand and pulling him toward the door.

"No, wait! Paul!" He said again, freeing from her hand and running toward the bed as she rolled her eyes again. _Paul._ His plush toy. She watched him as he climbed on the bed, obviously unconcerned about being on the bed with his shoes on, and ran a hand on her face. He disappeared under the covers, looking for his stuffed pet among the bed sheets and then finally re-emerging from them with Paul in his hand.

"You know? It would be easy if you stop to come in mom's bed every night!" She said in an annoyed tone as he stuck his tongue out at her and passed near her, then running down the stairs.

...

* * *

House felt his presence before he spoke, but didn't move, keeping his eyes closed as he pretended to be asleep. Three days in a row. Every time it was just a few minutes until the nurse came to take him back in the nursery school but... he had found himself waiting for him to pop over... and, well, he probably was going to miss him.

Gregory climbed on the bed and looked at him.

"Awe you sleeping?" He asked touching his cheek.

"Actually I _was_! Past tense!" He replied opening just one eye to look at him with a fake annoyed look "Why aren't you taking a nap too?" He asked.

He didn't answer and kept exploring his face moving his little fingers from his smooth chin to his nose and forehead and hair.

"What the hell are you doing?" He asked moving his tiny hand away from his face and rubbing his now tickling nose.

"You look a bit like daddy" He said nodding "But he doesn't have weiwd hair" he said looking at his hair "nor all these lines hewe" he added pointing to the wrinkle on his forehead and around his eyes "and he's not so smooth" He added again this time pointing at his cheeks.

"Whoa! He looks exactly like me then!" He said, laughing, looking at him as he laughed in turn.

He looked at him with his big eyes.

"Awe you weally going away?" He asked with a pout.

House sat up and took him on his knees.

"Hospital is for sick people, and I'm not sick anymore" He said looking at him as he nodded biting his lower lip.

"Can you come hewe to say hello sometimes?" He asked as his blue eyes grew even bigger.

"Maybe" he replied "But you have to be in the nursery school or I won't be able to find you" He added ruffling his hair as he smiled and nodded.

He looked at him as he suddenly climbed down his knees and reached for his backpack near the door, then climbing again on the bed next to him. House looked at him as he looked for something into it and then lost his patience turning his backpack upside down and spreading the contents on the bed as part of it rolled under the bed.

"Fow you" He said handing him a drawing and smiling "See? It's you and me and... I wrote my name all by myself" He said proudly.

House looked at that drawing. At that _"I love you"_ and at that "GrEgoRy" written in uneven and lopsided letters.

"Is this me?" He asked with a smile as he nodded and gave him an ear to ear smile.

"You awe the biggew one" he pointed out as House couldn't help but smile.

"Well, thank you then" He said looking at him "And...see? I already get well. Looks like you're better then all these doctors in here" he added.

Gregory smiled again.

"Not all" he said in a serious tone beginning to put his things back into his backpack "Mama is the gwetest doctow in the wowld"

House look at him. _What? No... it couldn't be..._ Again it was probably just a joke of his mind... Even because... well, it looked like the Dean of that place was a bearded man in his sixties. But... _what if...?_

"What's your mom's name?" He asked looking at him as he disappeared under the bed then re-emerging after a few seconds just for disappearing again.

"What's are you looking for?" He asked still looking at him.

"Paul!" He replied "My awm is too showt" He added pouting at him.

House held back a smile. _Paul? Who was Paul?_ He knelt and looked under the bed then reaching for the black plush under his bedside table.

 _"Gregory!"_

House looked up at the nurse on the doorway and just then at the plush toy in his hand.

 _Paul._

He froze. His eyes fixed on that black and white plush toy.

 _Paul the Penguin._

 _Paul the Peace Penguin._

He looked at Gregory's tiny hand as he reached for his _'Paul'_ from his big hand, then putting his little arms around his neck.

He stood motionless looking at him as he took the nurse's hand and gestured him one of his usual 'bye bye'.

He looked at that closing door. And at Gregory's head which popped over again.

"Lisa" he said with a big smile "It's my mommy's name" he said, then waving another bye-bye and disappearing behind that door.

He didn't reply, just looking at that now closed door.

How could it be possible? Was he really Cuddy's son? After all Lisa was a very common name... But... he didn't believe in coincidences, right? Was that really a coincidence? Or Wilson knew that she had moved there when he had wanted Boston as last stop-over of his _trip?_

It couldn't just be a coincidence. He was her son. _His_ son. That is why he glared at him with Cuddy's glare. That is why he looked at him like his own mirrored image looked at him.

How could have happened he didn't notice that she was pregnant? Yeah, she wasn't that pregnant but... how could have it happened that he didn't tell she was pregnant just by looking into her eyes?

He looked at the drawing on his bed. At that uneven and lopsided 'GrEgoRy'.

Why did she name him after the man that could have killed her and her baby?

 _"You look a bit like daddy" He had said him "But he doesn't have weiwd hair...nor all these lines hewe and he's not so smooth"_

What was going on? She didn't even attend his funeral, for Christ Sake! But... had she told her son about _him?_ About _'daddy'?_

He ran a hand on his forehead and then on his face as a sudden nausea closed his stomach.

 _Shit! She wasn't there because..._

He could not even finish that thought as soon as he folded that drawing in half and his eyes focused on what was on the other side of that paper sheet...

Cuddy's handwriting. Her unique handwriting. And a date. Just a few days before that fire.

His eyes focused on those words.

 _... I miss you... I miss you being you... I tried but I can't hate you..._

 _... and I still love you. And I can't help but ask to myself: "Did he really love me?"_

 _... and I wonder if I'll ever be happy again._

 _He paused on that 'I can't help but think... "Does he still love me like I do?" ...because, well... I know that I hurt you as much as you hurt me... so... I'm not blaming you if you don't... if you moved on...'_

 _Damn, Cuddy! How few you know me?_ He closed his eyes and sighed. Why a letter? Why a _damned_ letter?

He couldn't help but look at those words. There it was.

 _... there's not an easy way to say what I have to say... I just think you deserve to know. To know that in a few weeks a baby boy will look at the world for the first time._

 _... Our baby, House. Ours._

This time he couldn't stop the tear that rolled down his cheek turning the 's' of that 'ours' in a grey spot. He touched that spot with the tip of his finger and closed his eyes, then looking up to avoid other tears from falling. That is what those other grey spots on the paper were. Her tears.

 _... each one of his_ kicks reminds me of you...

...What do I have to say him, House? What do you want me to say him?

...all I want you to know is that I'm not going to keep him away from you.

...Is it that bad if I tell him he came from his parents' love? Because... he did, House.

He instinctively turned the sheet looking for the lacking part of that letter but he obviously found just Gregory's drawing. There was no way he could know what came after that but that was enough for him. Enough for him for now how much they had both lost. How much time they had both lost.

He looked again at what was the last sentence on that sheet.

At that _'... he came from his parents' love ...'_

"Yes, he did, Cuddy!" He whispered in the silence of that bedroom.


	5. There where everything began

**Chapter 5 - There where everything began**

 **...**

* * *

"Thank you" she said into the receiver, then looking up and meeting Dr. Wyle's gaze as he stood in the doorframe of her office.

She smiled, locking eyes with him and gesturing him to come in. He took a seat in front of her desk, still staring at her. The black silk blouse hidden under her white coat, but not enough to hide completely its neckline. He couldn't hear the voice on the other end of the line but he could tell by her eyes that one wasn't a work call. Her eyes brightened and her smile grew wider as she looked down at her desk again.

"I love you too, sweetheart. Be a good boy and give a kiss to Rachel for me, ok?"

He looked at her as she hung up, smiling in turn.

"So, did you finally manage to find a good babysitter?" He asked her.

"Gregory's grandma" She said, closing the folder in front of her "My... er... ex-boyfriend's mother" She said with a slight smile looking at Mike as he nodded.

"You never talk about him" He said looking at her "He's not in your and Gregory's life anymore, is he?"

Cuddy just stared at him for a moment and then shook her head.

"He died before Gregory's birth" She said, looking at him and then down at her own desk before looking up at him again.

"Oh... I... I'm sorry... I didn't mean to... really, Lisa... I'm sorry" he whispered looking at her as she smiled slightly biting her lip.

"Er... it's ok" She replied "Don't worry. You couldn't know" She said placing a hand on his and looking as he relaxed at that gesture.

She knew he had a crush on her. Actually everybody in that hospital ward knew. And she liked him. Tall, dark hair and eyes. He was handsome and a good man. Divorced but without children. And something in how he always asked her about Gregory and Rachel made her think that maybe he missed not being a father. And yet, that wasn't enough. Sometimes she thought something was wrong with her. At first she had convinced herself that it was because she had to deal with a newborn who drained all her energy, and then because that same newborn had turned into a toddler drawing even the energy she didn't know she had. But deep down she knew that it wasn't just that. She wouldn't and couldn't risk to put again a man in her children's life. It had been so hard with Rachel in the beginning. Giving her answers about House's ehm... _departure_. She was young, but not that young. And yet, every time she thought about that she knew she was lying to herself. Maybe she just had to... go on... and give herself a chance to be happy again.

"So? Is your invite for Saturday night still on the table?" She asked with a smile.

"Always" He replied smiling back.

They looked at each other.

"Fine" She replied with a smile then looking at her watch "I'm sorry! I really have to go and check on my patient if I don't want spend the night in here" she said looking up at him again and standing up as he stood up in turn "See you tomorrow, ok?" She said putting a hand on his shoulder and smiling again.

He just nodded, looking into her eyes and smiling in turn, then watching her as she walked down the hallway.

...

* * *

"I left the documents you asked for on your desk, Dr. Cuddy" Nurse Laura told her as she approached her own office and the nurse walked out of that same door.

She just thanked her with a nod and a smile. She was so tired that every one of her muscles ached, even the smaller one. She ran a hand on her neck. Well, at least the children were going to stay at Blythe's tonight, so she had just to pack her things and then she could go to sleep. It was already 11 pm. At least 3 hours after the scheduled end of her shift, and she knew that wasn't casual. She didn't want to go home. She didn't want it, because without her children that one was not home, just the house in which she lived. But tonight she was so tired she doubted she even could feel alone. She just wanted to have a shower and a herbal tea. She was too tired for everything else. And those documents on her desk could wait until tomorrow. That was something never happened in her _previous_ life.

She just glanced at those folders on the desk while she took off her white coat, taking the note that was on top of them.

What was that? A business card?

A _motor inn lodge business card_. A number written on it, probably a room number.

Her first thought was for Mike. No, he wasn't the kind of guy who could give her a motor inn business card! He definitely wasn't that bold. There was no way that card could be from him! He had need more than two years just for asking her out!

She turned it between her fingers just to find a writing on its back.

And her heart skipped a beat at those words.

 _"I wish I didn't, but I can't help it"_

She held her breathing as she read it again and again.

 _Oh my God..._

That writing. _God..._ Was it just her mind making fool of her? Was it really the same one which had been on a white board for years? Could it be just a coincidence? ... It ... it couldn't be...

She almost ran toward the door, opening it with such a violence that Nurse Laura looked at her with a half questioning and a half scared look.

"Do you know who left this in my office?" She asked so out of breathing that Nurse Laura looked at her with a worried look.

"A patient" She replied "He just asked me to put that card on your desk... I... er... is it something wrong?"

"Er... no... it's just that... a man with a cane?" She asked feeling insane just for thinking about that, even more for saying it out loud.

"No, Dr. Cuddy. No cane" She answered as Cuddy looked down at the card in her hand biting her lip "Er... tall and blue-eyed and... oh, yes, I think you heard about him. He was that one from the coma ward. You know? He was right about Nurse Anne. Early stage larynx cancer. She's going to have surgery next w..."

She looked at Cuddy as she suddenly blanched.

And Dr. Anderson words suddenly came into her mind... _'He opened his eyes after fourteen months and nine days in a coma and the first thing he said to nurse Anne is that her voice is too raspy so she need to see...'_

"Dr. Cuddy, are you ok?" She asked again.

"Er... ehm, yes" she replied looking at that card again and then up at her "Er... thank you" she added.

She drove along the highway following the voice of her GPS. Even without that she felt like she was on auto-pilot. Her eyes were fixed on the road but her mind was far away from there.

She looked at the bright sign and turned right into the parking lot of that motor inn.

 _Arbor Inn Motor Lodge._

She looked at that _'Arbor'..._ _Shit..._ Was that just another bad joke of her life? It obviously was just a common name for a motor lodge but... she couldn't avoid her mind from going back to the _'Ann Arbor'_ which had changed her life.

She approached the reception desk still turning that card in her hands.

"Er... I have to meet a friend... room 108" she said, looking at the number written in blue ink on that card.

Not that she needed to check it actually. She knew by heart every inch of that card by now.

The receptionist just nodded.

"Yes, Madam. First floor" He said gesturing toward the elevator.

Was it just her impression or there was a shade of sarcasm on that _Madam_? And a shade of mischievousness in the way he looked at her from head to toe?

...

* * *

She looked at the door in front of her and then at her own fist before knocking. Her heart was hammering in her chest so much that she thought she could collapse right there before someone could open that door.

Was it really him? And if yes... why? What was she going to do? Hugging him? Kissing him? Or... maybe slapping him hard in the face?

If that was real... was she more happy or mad at him?

All her questions and thoughts reset in the bare moment she faced him.

No sound came from her lips. She just stood there. Still. Motionless. Just looking at him and he at her. Eyes moving from her jeans and black silk shirt to his grey sweatpants and his white T-shirt. No words. Just... one staring at the other one.

"Cuddy..."

The bare sound of her own name broke her trance as a bursting bubble.

"Oh my God... Tell me it's true..." she whispered, reaching for him and resting a hand on his chest.

He didn't answer, just placing a hand on hers and squeezing it slightly.

She didn't look up at him, just watching her own hand and his one on hers, feeling his heart hammering under her fingers as much as hers.

"He... he told me you were d-dead" she whispered as her voice cracked and tears filled her eyes.

"He told me... oh my God, h-how could he?" She said as tears began to roll down her cheeks "How could _you_?" She pointed out.

House reached for her shoulder, stroking her lightly, but she abruptly pushed him away.

"How could you do that to me?" She cried, slapping her palm on his chest so hard that he almost stepped back, as tears rolled down her cheeks "How could you do that to _us_?" She repeated, hitting him hard on the chest again. Again. And again. And again.

"Cuddy..."

He took her wrists and held them as her teary eyes met his. Her look hurt him more than her slaps.

"How could you..." She repeated as her voice definitely cracked, replaced by sobs as he pulled her toward himself and held her, letting her hide her face against his chest and sob on his T-shirt.

"I'm so sorry" He just whispered on her hair as he held her so tight he thought he could hurt her.

They stayed like there what could be seconds or minutes or hours. None of them cared about that. She just wanted to get lost in the warmth of his arms and he in her scent.

"I'm sorr..." He repeated, still stroking her back, not finishing that word as she placed her fingers on his lips, then lightly caressing his lower lip with her thumb.

He looked at her as she bit her lip, then moving her hand to caress his smooth cheek, looking at her own hand.

"I..."

She suddenly stepped back, letting her arm fell along her side, and shook her head, sighing and then putting a hand on her forehead. He just looked at the shaking hand now covering the blue of her eyes as she took another step away from him. Relief turning into anger. Disbelief turning into realization.

"Cuddy"

He reached for her arm as she lightly lose her balance, but she pulled back and just reached for the only chair in that room, leaning against the back of it but not sitting down, before looking up at him again.

"You got everyone thinking you were dead..." She whispered, in what was somehow a statement and a sort of question at the same time. "How could you do that, House? How could you do that _to me_?"

He didn't answer, just staring at her. And for a moment he was temped of deflecting, clamming up as he did so many times or even attacking her, saying her that the world doesn't turn around her and that for once what he had done have nothing to do with her at all. But he couldn't. There was anger in her eyes, but most of all there was sorrow. The same sorrow he had felt in that letter.

"I didn't do that _to you_ , Cuddy" He said as he could clearly see her shoulders slightly stiffening at the firm and somehow dry tone of his voice.

"Wilson..." He just whispered in a softer tone, looking at her as the puzzled look in her eyes turned into an aware one and her lips lightly parted.

He shook his head, averting his eyes from her and looking at his own feet, inhaling deeply before opening his mouth to speak again.

"It was... I don't know, Cuddy... You know me... I did something stupid and... because of me being the worse friend in the world, he was gonna live his last months alone... he was gonna die alone... I had nothing left, Cuddy. Nothing but him. And I was letting him die alone. For once I did something altruistic. Well, from his point of view it was..." He said, slightly shaking his head again and running a hand on his face.

"Wilson and Foreman... they both saw me in that building a few minute before it collapsed because of the fire. It wasn't me. The corpse they found was the one of a poor suicide guy. I... I watched as everything collapsed... like my life... So... I don't know... I just seized the moment..."

He pause just a few seconds, looking up at her but not meeting her eyes. She was biting hard on her lower lip, her hands grasping the back of the chair in front of her.

"A few days after I attended from far to my own funeral. You wasn't there, Cuddy. Not even to say a goodbye. And that was the last proof I needed to know I had completely lost you."

He looked at her as an almost chocked _'Oh God...'_ escaped her lips, and he wished she could definitely sit down on that damned chair. She didn't. _Stubborn woman!_ She just looked up, locking eyes with him.

"I..." she whispered again "... I wasn't there because..." She put a hand on her mouth as the realization of how much the fate had played unfair with them hit her.

"We just decided to enjoy what we still had. He died after four months" he said looking at her as she bit her lip more and her eyed misted again "He was the one choosing Boston for his last breath. After his death... well, I went back to jail. You know me... more enemies than friends so... well, actually I don't remember anything, but it looked like a few hours after freedom this guy called Big Joe broke my head and I opened my eyes fourteen months later."

He looked at her. Her trembling hand still on her mouth.

"He knew..." she whispered without looking at him.

"What?"

"Wilson knew I was in Boston" She pointed out as she looked up meeting his gaze.

House shook his head and slightly smiled at the thought of Wilson _just being Wilson_...'till the end. And Cuddy shook her head too.

"What he didn't know was that I..." She looked at him and bit her lip again, then looking down.

She didn't move, just mentally thanking him for the few steps he took toward her. She couldn't tell if he felt the shiver that the light touch of his hand on her arm triggered, but she felt him shivering as soon as her hand found his on her own arm.

"You can't even imagine what a hell my life was after that..." She whispered, immediately sensing his guilt at those words as his hand tried to pull back from her arm. But she didn't let him, squeezing his hand and holding it there.

"I'll never forgive myself for that, Cuddy. I have no excuses for what I did. And I'll never have. And -"

"Shut up" she said as she had done so many times in the past, from behind her desk in PPTH. The tone of her voice contrasting with the way in which her thumb caressed his hand still on her arm.

"You can't even imagine what a hell my life was after that... without you" She whispered again, releasing the grip of her hand on the back of the chair and turning to face him completely.

Her eyes watched her own hand moving up slowly along his arm, as the fingers of her other hand found his, intertwining with his.

"I can't believe that for all this time... you were just a few feet from me. Actually... _under my feet_ since that ward is exactly under mine" She said shaking her head and this time, looking up, locking eyes with him.

They both sighed at that contact of her hand with his cheek, that reminded them of the last time she had done that, that time caressing his stubble. And her lips found his. She brushed his lips with hers, closing her eyes and just savoring that feeling. His warm breath mixing with hers, as his hand found her cheek in turn, caressing her before moving it down her neck and shoulder, then slightly wrapping her waist. Their lips opened slightly and their tongues found each other in the sweetest way. Slowly. And deeply.

He hold her tighter. There was no way he was going to let her go this time. Nor that anyway she wanted to go anywhere else.

She smiled as she pulled away just to look for air, still brushing his lips.

"How did you find me?" She asked reaching for his cheek and caressing it.

He shook his head, as this time he couldn't help but slightly smile in turn.

"I didn't find you. A _blue-eyed toddler with too-many-R-in-his-name-to-handle-with_ found me" He said as her eyes suddenly widened.

"What...? ... G-Gregory?" She asked in disbelief as he smiled at the look in her eyes.

"He's... he's just... well, at least I did something good, Cuddy" He said looking at her as her lower lip trembled.

"He's smart" He said again as she smiled despite the tear that rolled down her cheek "And... you did a great work."

"He's a tornado" She replied, again biting her lip.

"Did you expect something different?" He laughed looking at her as a laugher escaped her lips too, despite the tears rolling down her cheeks.

He kissed her forehead, cupping her face and wiping away her tears with his thumbs.

"How can you be not mad at me?" She asked. Her guilt so evident that he could almost touch it like he was touching her tears.

"For not having get rid of the only good thing I did?" He replied, looking at her as she bit her lip "He's the best gift you could give me, Cuddy" He replied as she looked away for an instant, then meeting his gaze again, smiling slightly.

"He's the best gift you could give me" She said stroking his cheek again.

He kiss her forehead again and took her hand, leading her toward the bed and then handing her the drawing that was on the nightstand. She just looked at it and then up at him... and then down again at that _'I love you. GrEgorY'_ as this time a whirlwind of emotions overwhelmed her, forcing her to sit down on the bed. And she closed her eyes as soon as she realized what that paper sheet was. And where that sentence on the business card came from. That... _'I wish I didn't but I can't help it'_ wasn't just what she had told him on that night in his apartment... actually the worse love declaration ever. That was his answer to her _'Does he still love me like I do?'_

"Do you, Cuddy?" He asked, awakening her from her thoughts and practically reading her mind "Do you still love me?" He pointed out sitting down next to her.

"Oh God... yes" She replied putting a hand on his and the other one on his cheek.

He took her face with both hands and looked into her eyes, wiping away another tear with his thumb.

"The mailman returned that to me" She said biting her lip "In... in the missing part I told you where you could find us... then... well, Wilson phoned me and... everything didn't matter anymore. I... I wasn't there, House, at your funeral, because I... I gave birth to our son five hours after that phone call" She sighed but didn't look away still looking into his eyes "I'm so sorry..."

He was the one who found her lips this time, brushing them with his before deepening that kiss.

"Stay here tonight..." He whispered leaning his forehead on hers and opening his eyes meeting hers.

"Tonight..." She repeated still staring at him "And... what's going to happen tomorrow, House?" She asked painfully looking into his eyes.

"I don't know..." he answered, shaking his head slightly as she nodded and stroked his cheek again, not averting her eyes from his.

"What do you want, Cuddy?" He asked still looking at her, lingering in the feeling of her hand on his skin.

She smiled, shaking her head slightly again and looking at her own hand stroking his cheek.

"Your stubble back" She replied with a smile as a smile appeared on his lips too.

"Well... it's a beginning" He answered still smiling at her attempt to keep things light and looking into her eyes.

"I don't want to stay here tonight, House..." She said again "I know how it is to be with you, and I know how it is to be without you and... the only thing I want is you... tonight and tomorrow and the night after that..." She looked straight into his eyes "But this isn't the point. It's not just me anymore. The point is... do _you_ want _us_ , House?" She looked down as his thumb caressed her cheek again and sighed "I... I already lost you once and God knows how much I don't want to lose you again, but..."

"So it's two of us, Cuddy" He replied as she looked up meeting his gaze again "I love you. I want you. I don't know what will be of my life from now on, Cuddy, but I know I want you into it. The three of you." He said caressing her face again "I know it can't be easy. I don't even have a work... I have nothing..." He said looking into her eyes and lightly touching her lips with his.

"You have us" She replied as this time even his eyes misted.

He nodded, biting his lower lip to avoid emotions from overwhelming him as the simplicity and, at the same time, the power of those three words floored him like never before. Her thumb freed it, and she brushed it lightly with her own lips, savouring the strange sensation of the softness of his mouth against hers. It was a strange one, but not a new one. The same feeling of their first kiss, so many years ago. Their tongues found each other in a so natural way they couldn't help but just letting go, losing themselves in that kiss. A kiss in which the more they got lost in it, the more they found themselves again. They were so different now, and still so alike to those same two students. Through bad and good times, here they were again.

"Did this place sound in a way familiar to you?" She whispered, smiling slightly on his lips.

He smiled in turn, knowing exactly what she was referring to. At the 'Arbor' of that 'Arbor Inn Motor Lodge'.

"Where everything began" He whispered in turn, sucking on her lower lip, this time sending her a shiver in her lower abdomen.

The sound of an incoming text on her cell broke the spell, but she took a moment to linger on his lips before standing up and looking for it on her purse, still abandoned beside the door. She just smiled at that message, then looking up at him as she couldn't avoid feeling his discomfort and reading his mind.

"Not what you're thinking" She said, sitting down again next to him, and resting a hand on his knee.

"I'm not naive, Cuddy" He replied, in an ironic tone "You're a beautiful woman. It would be naive for me thinking no man pleasantly explored your vagina in these years, making you moan and scream"

A little laugh escaped her mouth. It wouldn't be him if he didn't use any explicit and colorful expression instead of just asking if she had sex with someone.

"Oh well, actually someone did" She said, watching him as he looked at her hand on his own knee, avoiding her gaze "I moaned. I think I screamed too, but I actually don't remember very well" she said, paying him back for his jealousy, but taking his chin to have him looking into her eyes "But I'm not sure if popping someone out of my vagina can be counted like pleasant exploration" She said smiling slightly at the sudden change of the look on his face, as at the same time she handed him her phone. And he couldn't help but smile in turn at the view of that picture. An asleep Gregory curled up against an as much asleep Rachel.

"She's so big now..." He just whispered, still looking at the picture. Actually she was. And the sad shade in his voice made her heart ache.

"They're like the Beagle Boys sometimes. Once he convinced her to sleep under my bed. With their sleeping bags and everything else. They just waited for the babysitter to fall asleep on the couch. She almost had an heart attack when she found their empty beds and she couldn't find them anywhere." She said smiling and shaking her head, then pointing to the picture still on the phone screen "That's why I can't find any willing babysitter anymore and why now who takes care of them every time send me one of these" She said again, smiling at the smile that appeared on House's face.

"Oh well, last time I asked you it didn't end well, but... do you need a babysitter?" He said playfully and making her laugh.

"It depends..." she said while a mischievous smile played on her lips "Do you give extra services?" She asked looking at him as he smiled in turn.

He ran his tongue on his lips then moving his hand from her cheek to her neck, lightly kissing her lips and then kissing her cheek and neck.

"Put me on test" He whispered on her ear then kissing her behind it as she shivered.

She didn't answered but clung to him, holding his head in place as he still kissed her neck, savouring that feeling and then lying down on the bed, pulling him with her.

The last time a man had be on top of her she had pushed him away before he had time to unclasp her bra. As soon as the feeling of his smooth chin against her skin had made her aware of who actually was the man kissing her.

"What's wrong?" He asked, feeling her hesitation and lifting his head to look at her.

"I love you" She just answered, smiling slightly as his lips found hers and her hand found the smoothness of his cheek "But... I wasn't joking" She whispered, biting her lip "It's been so long since I..."

"I can luckily say the same, Cuddy. Unless you're thinking I found new pleasures..." He said, looking into her eyes whit a sly smile "You know? I even considered it but _Little Greg_ wasn't up at all for my cellmate's hairy and tattooed ass. Yours on the other han-"

Her hand slapped his shoulder so hard that an _'ouch'_ replaced the last part of that sentence, before it found the back of his neck, forcing him to bow his head and his lips to meet hers again.

"Shut up and kiss me, you ass" She whispered, meeting his mischievous gaze just for a moment, until his tongue in her mouth made her close her eyes and moan in pleasure.

She had missed so much the feeling of his hands on her skin... and now it felt so _familiar_. Her body reacting to his fingers like an instrument played by a skilled performer. And his too. He never thought he'd have the chance to feel like that anymore. Being one thing with her again was something going beyond his expectations. Not just the overwhelming passion that so many times had burned them. Their labored breathing filled the room and they savored every second of that... every touch, every kiss, every moan. It was love. Just love.

He looked at her naked body clung to his and stroked her hair, just listening to her now calm breathing, then kissing her hair and covering them both with the bed sheet.

How could she made him feel like that? He had been a dead man and he had come back to life just for feeling dead every day since Wilson's death... until she had walked through that door. If he still had a little doubt now he had no more. She was his life. And he was going to do everything not to screw up that again.

"Standing to the restraining order of the Court I have to stay at least 700 ft away from you." He said, stroking her hair and laughing as she stopped the hand caressing his chest and raised her head to look at him.

"Oh well, I suppose I have to drop it" She replied brushing his lips with hers and looking at him with a mischievous smile.

"Good" He said looking at her with an even more mischievous smile, slightly biting her lower lip and sucking it "Even if, Cuddy, right now I don't give a damn about being 700 ft away from you..." he whispered rolling her under him again and stroking her hip with his thumb"... I'm more focused on being 7 inches inside of you" he said, moving on top of her as she rolled her eyes and smiled.

"You're never going to change, aren't you?" She said smiling on his lips and stroking the hair on the back of his head.

"Would you really want me to?" He asked sucking on her lower lip again and looking into her eyes.

"No. Definitely not" She answered, then finding his mouth in another long kiss.

 **...**

 **THE END**

...

* * *

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Well, this is the ending of this story like I thought it at first. I'm full aware things can't be so easy after an act of domestic violence, but I can't help but always try to give these two their happy ending.

Moreover, someone already asked me to go on with this story _(Gracias por compartir tu tiempo y esta pasión conmigo, you Huddy girl!)_ I didn't consider writing a sequel, but I'm ok with an epilogue. I'm working on it and I think I'll have enough inspiration to write it and post it soon.

I'll post it as a separate FF though, even if it will be just a one-chapter one. Why? Because I rated this FF as T, and I don't think the epilogue is gonna be less than M rated. I could have changed the rate of this FF to M, but I didn't want to risk to hide the entire story for someone of you out there. So... see you soon. Look for **"The letter - Epilogue"** and for my next fanfics (I promise a House-Rachel FF and it will come soon).

Thank you to all of you! It's amazing how good people there are in this Huddy world!


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